lazy posting- -aka brain dead today

A long time ago, I was reading over at lunatic-kate and came across a list of funnies that made me laugh.

Here are some of them and I hope they make you laugh too.

  • My husband and I divorced over religious differences, he thought he was God and I didn't.
  • I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
  • Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
  • I used to have a handle on life but it broke.
  • You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
  • Out of my mind; back in 5 minutes.
  • God must love stupid people; he made so many.
  • Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
  • Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.
  • A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
  • He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
  • Ham and eggs; a day's work for the chicken, a lifetime commitment for the pig.
  • The trouble with life is there's no background music.
  • I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.

Comments

  1. Jayne; 5, 6 and 8 are my favourites.

    ReplyDelete
  2. No 2 for me and definitely 3 for my extended family.

    ReplyDelete
  3. JahTeh; good choices. I can see how #3 would be for you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. The last one - definitely the last one (smiles and nods whilst typing this)

    ReplyDelete

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