All you parents out there, remember when your kids were little and you thwarted them somehow for something?
They would be red faced, angry, crying, yelling "I hate you!"
Did you ever yell back "I hate you too!"?
I prefaced it with "right now", which softened the blow a bit I suppose, but I don't think it did the kids any harm to know that Mum could be angry enough sometimes to "hate" them.
On the plus side, even when angry, I loved them and they knew it. They loved me too, but probably didn't realise it when yelling "I hate you."
I remember being about six years old and "hating" my mum for some childish reason and saying I wanted to leave home. And I meant it. I was going. I dragged out my school case to put things in and was stopped in my tracks by mum offering to pack it for me.
She wanted me to go??
Well, too bad! I wasn't going anywhere! Why should I make her happy by leaving?
I'd hang around and she'd be miserable. So there!
Of course it was all forgotten the next morning.
Years later my own daughter, age five, was hating me for some reason I can't remember and wanting to leave home and go to live with Grandma. I talked to her and said okay, if she wants to go, she can, but she has to wait until she is sixteen. Because it is illegal for children to travel on trains and buses by themselves until they are sixteen. T-"What's illegal?" Me- It just isn't allowed. If a policeman finds you, he will bring you straight home to me.
So T agreed to stay with us, but was adamant that on her sixteenth birthday, she'd be leaving.
I recently saw a jewellery advertisement on TV which featured a diamond encrusted tennis bracelet.
Forget the encrusted diamonds, which were quite beautiful, and tell me, why is this called a "tennis" bracelet? What does a bracelet, diamond encrusted or not, have to do with tennis? Surely one doesn't wear such a bracelet, or any bracelet, when playing tennis? And why are there only tennis bracelets? Why not tennis earrings, tennis necklaces?
Here's a passage from the book I've just finished reading. "The Last Detective" by Robert Crais.
"Time was what filled your moments, so if your moments were empty, time had no meaning.
Emptiness did not flow or pass, it simply was.
Letting himself be empty was like putting himself in neutral."
A little enigmatic on its own, but in the context of the story it made perfect sense.
And now, a quote by me. Yes, me. I made it up.
"That muddy pool of despair is fine for a spot of puddle jumping, but not for any longer than it takes you to get over it."
Wallow if you must but then climb on out and shake it off.
"Easy for you to say", I hear you all shouting, "you don't suffer from depression."
And you're right. I don't.
I know people who do, I've lived with people who do.
And even with seeing it happen, following the moods through the cycles, trying to help, I still don't understand it.
I never will.