Words for Wednesday

The original Words for Wednesday was begun by Delores and eventually taken over by a moveable feast of participants when Delores had computer troubles. Sadly, Delores has now closed her blog forever due to other problems.

The aim of the words is to encourage us to write. A story, a poem, whatever comes to mind.

If you are posting an entry on your own blog, please let us know so we can come along and read it.

This month the prompts are supplied by ME and can be found right here.

This week's words/prompts are: 
1. pizza 
2. vase 
3. racing 
4. chainsaw 
5. derelict 
6. buttery 

and/or: 

hand over the ham!


use either list or both, or mix and match, just have fun.


Comments

  1. They knew they were in a different kind of trouble indeed when Henry came down the stairs with the chainsaw running.

    He'd been losing it for a while, his odd behavior more evident at mealtimes when he would lavishly butter his pizza or demand that the family ham be handed over to him for distribution to the rest of them. One night he poured wine into the sideboard vase and another he would race around the table blessing himself.

    They had to face up to it now. They had been derelict in not treating his deterioration more seriously. But it was fun while it lasted.

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    Replies
    1. A different kind of trouble indeed. Who knew that buttering your pizza and hogging the ham would be a better alternative. Love this.

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    2. I wonder what he used the chainsaw on upstairs!!

      Run! Run! No one is save! :)

      Well done. :)

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    3. It was fun for a while, but now... Great story!

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    4. Enjoyed this because it sounded like a Thanksgiving family affair at my place (minus the chainsaw :)

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    5. WWW; this was fun to read, although I'm glad now that something will be done about Henry. Perhaps he sees the chainsaw as a speedier alternative to the usual carving knife.

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    6. Oh, noooo... Henry is the most gentlest Lion in the world, no chainsaw - I hope!

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    7. I was expecting a more macabre story when he came downstairs with the chainsaw.

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  2. Laura settled the buttery yellow roses in a vase by the window. Glancing out the window, she watched as an old derelict was racing after the pizza delivery man carrying her pepperoni pizza and extra cheese. Laura could hear the old man's chainsaw buzzing as he yelled, "Mine! Mine!". She sighed. After settling the vase down, Laura decided that from now on she would order Chinese spicy Szechwan chicken. The old guy hated that.

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    Replies
    1. Is it wrong of me to feel sorry for the old guy? Perhaps Laura could just order extra next time.

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    2. Yeah! The poor old fella! :)

      Laura is a meanie! lol

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    3. It sounds like the guy needs someone to invite him for dinner.

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    4. Loved the "buttery yellow roses" by the window:) And, Laura should warn Uber Eats that she has a hungry neighbor!

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    5. Susan Kane; I think the others are correct and the old derelict just needs someone to give him a good meal, and while he is munching they could 'lose' the chainsaw. Another fun tale.

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    6. Love this (I would fight for my Pizza, though!).

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    7. No one gets my pizza but I certainly would order him one all for his lonesome :) Great take.

      XO
      WWW

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    8. Yes, definitely order extra.

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  3. Ruth! For the final time I am telling you! Don't make that face at me. I would be derelict in my duty as a friend if I didn't tell you this.
    Hand over the ham! and step away from the pizza. And from the buttery pastries you have stashed behind that huge vase. I can see them, and you are not fooling anyone.

    We need to take a chainsaw to your appetite. You eat enough for three people at every sitting. If you keep this up you will be racing towards an early death.

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    Replies
    1. That's one way to hog the ham for yourself!! :)

      Good one, EC

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    2. Some you just have to have a pastry, though!

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    3. I don't think Ruth would earn a Golden Ticket at Willy Wonka's Chocolate factory... (Maybe a pizza or a hock of ham... but not the big kahuna :)

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    4. Elephant's Child; a third fun read. I think Ruth needs to listen and stop the gluttony. If she isn't careful she might find herself on Lucifer's list, like the "Essie Farnsworth" of a previous gluttony story.

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    5. Oh, Ruth. Listen to those who love you. Leave the pastries by the steps, and I will check them out.

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    6. Oh, maybe a true story? They have a show here "Living with 300kg", it´s so cruel I cannot watch. Poeple try to eat less and can not.

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    7. Oh poor Ruth, but telling people to stop overeating never works and just makes them eat more because of the stress of all that judgement and monitoring their intake. I hope she gets well. Excellent take.

      XO
      WWW.

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    8. I'll take the ham Please.

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  4. Here I go....

    "The pizza was a tough as old shoe leather. I’d need a chainsaw to cut it!

    Many, many years had passed by since I’d patronised a fast-food outlet. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d set foot in one, but I was racing against the clock.

    Time was of the essence.

    I had to make it to the auction being held at the derelict old home...the estate that had once belonged to my grandparents. I had to get hold of the ornate, gold-plated vase. I knew the secrets that were hidden in its base; secrets unsafe in the hands of others.

    Rising from the table, I pushed the offensive pizza aside. I felt like calling out to the girl behind the counter. ”Just hand over the ham on a buttery piece of bread, and I’ll be on my way!”

    However, I kept my manners in check, and left without a word."

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    Replies
    1. Oooh. And now I want to know more about the secrets contained in that vase...

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    2. Wow, i hope he gets what he's seeking.

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    3. Awesome! I have made some chainsaw-worthy pizzas in my time, sadly, but have never found/been gifted a gold-plated vase with lots (maybe?) of secret goodies...

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    4. Lee; a good one that reminded me of the last pizza I had in the oven too long, a chainsaw would have been handy then. I hope he or she gets the vase from the estate and maybe a few other mementoes too. I'm wondering what the secrets are.

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    5. The vase must hold some secrets, maybe?

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    6. I'm wondering what the secrets are, too! lol

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    7. Oh, Lee, you "have me in tears"! What a nasty pizza! An offensive one even!!!

      Yes. Sad, that´s what I´d do. Leave without a word. Not right...

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    8. Mad curious about that vase and its secrets. Excellent take.

      XO
      WWW

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    9. Yes, gotta know the secrets, won't sleep tonight.

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  5. The pizza tasted good, the vase was pretty, but racing down the street chased by a derelict with a chainsaw not so good but I've missed out buttery, maybe not.
    Merle.............

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    Replies
    1. Using all the words is optional. I am so glad you joined us - and would hate to be chased down the street by a derelict (with or without a chainsaw).

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    2. Hope you continue to get away from that derelict, pizza intact.

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    3. Yeah, keep that derelict away from you - and your tasty pizza! He was probably an asshole anyway.. I heard he worked at the butt-ery.


      [Desperately searching for an "angel" halo emoji for such a bad joke!]

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    4. Merle; thank you for joining in. As EC says, there's no need to use all the words. Great story, there's a lot of derelict men out there with chainsaws it seems.

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    5. The chainsaw is a buzz killer for any pizza.

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    6. I hope the derelict slips on a buttery cobblestone, LOL. Great take.

      XO
      WWW

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  6. The Case of the Vase...(Part 1 :)

    Frankie groaned as Mr. Hamm ended with his usual repeating of the assignments.

    “This week’s words or prompts are…”

    Dragging the battered headphones from his neck, he hit the play button and the Walkman, nuzzled on his hip like a musical flask, whirred into action. Depeche Mode sang about getting their kicks on Route 66 and not forgetting about going to San Bernardino, which had to be in California.

    Frankie stared out the grimy windows and dreamt again of skipping this useless town with its miserable weather. If I was in Cali now… Man, I’d be on Venice Beach eating Pizza with my homies, watching the ladies skate the boardwalk, sidewalk, or wherever…

    He grabbed his backpack. Sweet. M.C. Hammer was finished. Freddie nodded and smiled at his English teacher, imagining the skinny, white dude rapping in a pair of baggy pants. Shit. I wouldn’t want to touch that.

    Two hours later, Freddie lay on his bed. Too early for Blockbusters—the best videos wouldn’t be returned yet—but too late to call the guys. They’d be at Wal-Mart, running down abandoned grocery carts as slowly as possible.

    Well, there was always—

    That knocking downstairs was so insistent that, as he sprang off the bed, he was happy Ma wasn’t there to see him get cuffed. He instinctively took a step back so the door wouldn’t hit him as the cops loaded in, but then Freddie laughed as his best friend stood there, alone, with the stupidest look.

    “Spider, why you got a freaking Vase? You forgot the flowers, fool.”

    Their jokes always caused minutes-long banter session that led to many “your Momma” moments, but Spider stood there like a mute. Freddie grabbed him inside, scared to see his best friend for thirteen years stood there, his breath ragged and Racing.

    “What the—? You ok?”

    Spider shook his head, spluttered something Freddie didn’t understand, which normally was OK. Spides was a spaz. He walked Spides into the living room.

    “What’s going on, bro? Want me to call the cops?”

    Spider dropped to the soft couch, but as he settled, so did the vase, and as it rolled toward its master, Freddie saw a shitload of what totally looked like wet blood dripping down a bulbous side. Spider followed his buddy’s eyes, and both watched a fat tear of blood drip from the belly of the vase onto the cream couch. Spider cackled. Freddie was shit-scared.

    “Freddie, dude, your Mom got a gun? Or can we borrow some of the long knives in the kitchen? How about a Chainsaw in the garage?"

    Spider got a case of the scariest giggles and as he clutched his sides and bounced around the couch, the vase moved from side to side, painting the seat of the couch red like a gory paint roller.

    “Spider, you goddamn Derelict. Stop freaking me out. What the hell is going on?”

    “Don’t you get it? He’s dead, man.”

    Spider held the vase up like a quarterback holding a state champs’ trophy....


    (Part 2 continued in next comment!!)

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    1. (Part 2...)

      Freddie looked down at his friend in horror.

      “Right there in the lounge, man. There was no one else there. Making one of those stupid, Buttery
      sandwiches, he was, and he had no idea I was there. I hit him, and he dropped like a hooker’s panties.”

      Freddie took two steps backward, hit a table and heard things shake and fall… including the wireless handset from its cradle. Shit… He kept his eyes on Spider while his right hand snaked back on a search mission.

      “Freddie, know what the best part was? Wanna know, right? I know you do.”

      “Sure, Spides.”

      His fingers hit the plastic casing and the stupid-ass Motorola skittered away another inch. Spider cradled the vase against his chest like it was a sleeping newborn.

      “Dude, he was, like, making a sandwich and when I whacked him that first time, he fell, turned, then looked up at me in shock. Then, the anger lit him up. Man, oh man, so guess what I said?”

      Freddie had the Motorola in his palm, and after the last months chatting with Lindsey, he knew the layout like the opposite side of his palm. He hit the ON button, walked his fingers three rows down, then three rows to the right, praying he wouldn’t hit 888.

      Hearing a tinny operator, Freddie yelled.

      “Yeah, Spider. Shit, come on now! Tell me how you killed our English teacher.”

      “Dude, why you shouting, you dumbass? Thought you’d be happy.”

      “Dude, I am, but you freaked me out, right. C’mon now, what did you do?”

      “He was making the stupid sandwich, right?”

      Freddie nodded, hoping the 911 operator had ESP hearing.

      “The rest was easy. 'Hand over the ham!,'" I said, and when he didn’t, well, I handed it to Hamm, didn’t I?”

      Spider looked down at his baby/vase. Freddie whiplashed his head around. The ON light was still green. Help was on the way, Jesus, he hoped so anyway. There was a silence like they’d never had before. Spider looked at him, his head to one side, like he knew something was going on. Freddie had an internal freak out.

      “Dude, you wanna like go to Blockbuster later? They’ve got 20 extra copies of Top Gun…”

      Spider stood up and shoved his right hand inside the vase, like a ceramic boxing glove. He took a step forward and the truth was in his eyes.

      Freddie knew he’d never see San Bernardino…

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    2. When some people snap, it's for good. Scary, and well told.

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    3. Such innocent words, and such a scary take on them...

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    4. Mark Koopmans; OMG, you are one scary dude. Spider has finally cracked. I hope he doesn't notice the phone is turned on, perhaps help will get there in time to save Freddie and lock away Spider.

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    5. Don't trust that Spider has actually cracked.

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    6. What a scary story Mark. Where do these tales come from?

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    7. @Mark Koopmans: Totally unexpected. All those little details like Blockbusters, walkmans, makes me of the late 1980's, I hear Bloackbuster and I think of the 80's or 90's. Great use of the prompts.

      Have a lovely day.

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  7. Kept me reading for awhile - lovely stories River.
    Yes, I have had a go this week...

    The family hadn’t had ‘pizza’ for a long time. No one tried to make one either, so, it was decided we would go from the farm to the other side of town to purchase one.
    I had to wash my ‘buttery’ hands as I had been making butter for the house as we always preferred homemade butter than bought.
    Rushing out the door the youngest child accidently knocked the ‘vase’ over and it shattered on the wooden floor, but of course this had to be cleaned up before we left.
    We all hopped into the car and headed along the country road where we saw a man in the twilight with a ‘chainsaw’ cutting wood into small pieces; we expect that the wood would be for his heater at his house.
    Further on someone passed our car like a madman, he appeared to be racing because we came across a man with a flag on the side of the road also holding up a number which meant another lap.
    We passed ‘derelict’ buildings along the way on the outskirts of town finally reaching our destination to buy our pizza.

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    Replies
    1. Margaret D: I really like this - and having only had home made butter once I agree, it is MUCH better than anything I can buy in a supermarket.
      This was an eventful - but a fun drive.

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    2. Margaret D; a really great use of my words. I'm hoping the town isn't too big as the pizza might get cold on the way home. I've never eaten home made butter although I did once make a tiny bit by over whipping the cream. I should have tasted it instead of throwing it out.

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    3. Haven't had homemade butter in years. Delicious stuff.

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  8. My Brother, my Mum, whoever (well, Mum sadly has passed), they could go to Da Nico and order a "Ten Without Ham".
    They do not use a chainsaw to cut out the ham. I do not like warm ham, hand it over to someone else. They skip it (price of this Pizza is the same).

    I was 14 last time I sat in their restaurant. It was my Birthday. But ever since I ordered a "Ten Without Ham" - it must be #16 or such by now.
    I am 48 years of age now, yet....

    When my Brother orders a „Ten ...“ on the phone in my old tiny hometown they say: „Can get cold, right? Goes to Braunschweig, right?“ And it does. No racing, just let it cool down. Braunschweig is 60+km away. And then you need to find a place to park the car.

    Me? I bend down and get a vase from the cupbard under the sink as my dear Brother usually brings flowers with said Ten.
    I´d love to give him a buttery bread, but he loves this Pizza too, and I certainly do share (these days he brings his Daughters, my, I have to fight for my share (with my hands, no chainsaw).

    No I cannot write fiction, this is true.
    Nico - or his wife - is always so proud when a Ten goes to Braunschweig. It´s been a while. I need to ask for one.

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    Replies
    1. I really enjoyed your take on the prompts - and non-fiction is fine. Non-fiction is more than fine.

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    2. Iris Flavia; thank you for joining in, this is a good story and better by being true. I don't like ham on a pizza either unless it's one I make myself, so I know the ham is fresh. Here in Australia, pizza places declare they will deliver within a certain time so the pizza is still hot, if they are late and deliver a cold or cool pizza, you get it for free. Well, that's how it used to be, I don't know if they still do that.
      I like that your brother brings flowers with the pizza :)

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    3. Elephant's Child, thank you :-)

      ____

      River, for free, Oh! I took off with a cooler bag on myself from your Pizza Hut (Perth), took Transperth and certainly it was... a bit warm, no more.
      Thank you for offering such opportunities to tell a story. (That´s where part of my blog-title is from, that Pizza). Yes, my "Baby-Brother" is a great guy. I treated him well ;-)

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  9. Here's my take, somewhat late, but...

    Funny you should choose HAND OVER THE HAM River as Matt always has luncheon meat and it is very often ham. He makes a sandwich but I use a small amount for my breakfast dish which I make in a Ramekin using a BUTTERY flavoured oil with scrambled eggs, grated Habanero cheese and ham. I cook it in my Air Fryer for 10 minutes. Funnily enough, we rarely eat PIZZA but recently, at the bowling alley, we had some cheese pizza which was absolutely delicious. I ate two pieces, not good for my waist line. We had this for lunch because we had an appointment in the morning and were RACING to get to the alley in time. Because Valentine’s Day is on the horizon I have been thinking of getting some fresh flowers for a change. They look so good in the crystal glass VASE on the coffee table. Checking the words as I go along made me remember, we used to have a CHAINSAW when we lived in North Carolina and frequently had to use it for dealing with trees which had been blown down by hurricanes. We lost 19 trees over the years we lived there so as you can imagine, it came in very useful. Of course sometimes the hurricanes were so bad that properties looked more like DERELICTs than people’s homes. We were always very lucky in that the trees never hit our home.

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    Replies
    1. Jo: I love this and am very glad that none of the trees ever fell on your home. It is years since I have had a pizza too - though from time to time we order a gozleme, the turkish equivalent.

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    2. Never heard of a gozleme Sue. That would be a great Word for Wednesday at a later date.

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    3. @Jo: I love pizza though they are not good for my waist line either. Good use of the prompts.

      Have a lovely day.

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    4. Jo; thank you for joining in, I like your story and am also glad none of those trees fell on your house. A chainsaw certainly would be handy for cutting up those.

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  10. I wrote about a house - you can read it here.

    I had titled this piece 'My house is haunted but I don't mind' but decided on the other title because that seems to fit better.

    Thanks for the prompts. Have a lovely day.

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  11. Better late than never. Continuing my story of Susan. It seems I can either write or knit. Not both.

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