in today's paper
Wordplay: goblin your food is no good for your elf.
From the comic strip Ginger Meggs: I know so little that it astonishes me how many people know even less.
Just a thought: People get into debt trying to keep up with those who already are.
By Carole Whitelock in the weekly "Boomer" section each Monday:
Daft instructions to save us from ourselves:
"I love hot takeaway coffee that tells me not to pour it in the crotch area, and I applaud food products that tactfully suggest I remove packaging before cooking. So thoughtful."
"We're very invested in things that are "natural" or from "all-natural ingredients" Well, how about body lotions that contain cyclotelfusiloxane, dimethicone or triethano-something-or-other that I scribbled down and can't decipher"
This on some medication:" Every night before food once daily four times daily, every three times daily take one tablet take three, one or two." (HUH???)
Humour is also creeping into instructions. There's a lotion recommending: "Apply to skin that reminds you of the pet scaly iguana your cousin had at school."
A dog shampoo says: " Block off all escape routes, as when wet and slippery, your pooch is smarter and faster than you."
An American hair conditioner suggests: "Rub through hair. Now feel free to belt out some terrible 80s tune you only shower-sing when no one's around."
Best yet are the T-shirts labelled: "We tested these on animals. They didn't fit."
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Love those t-shirt labels. Truth in advertising.
ReplyDeleteElephant's Child; truth in advertising is so rare.
DeleteYour pooch really is smarter and faster than you.
ReplyDeleteMike; that's why I don't have a pooch.
DeleteThese tickled my fancy R. Thanks for that :)
ReplyDeleteMargaret D; you're welcome. Found you in spam again.
DeleteHehe, those instructions take the prize. I always read and wonder whoever wrote suct things.
ReplyDeleteCharlotte; some instructions have me really laughing hard.
Delete"Drifting Through Life" may damage your mental health if consumed in excess. Visitors are advised to take small doses only.
ReplyDeleteYorkshire Pudding; so it's a good thing I no longer post daily?
DeleteI remember writing a post a long time ago about mad instructions on objects. Like "Don't iron clothes while you are wearing them!" SOmebody must have done it.
ReplyDelete:o)
Cheers
PM
Plasman; I remember that one too.
DeleteHad to laugh at the dog shampoo. That is too true.
ReplyDeleteArkansas Patti; it is true, most dogs don't like baths and will get away if they can.
DeleteWe've had to prove the hard way, when bathing them was the only choice, that the same is true of cats.
ReplyDeletemessymimi; I've never had to bath a cat, although I did approach Angel several times when he was a kitten with diarrhoea, I asked him to please hold still while I cleaned the messy area and he always did.
DeleteI once bathed a cat ... let's just say IF I ever have to do that again, I'll find the neared suit of armour first.
DeleteLots of fun...should be more of it!
ReplyDeleteTo my dismay the "Courier Mail" decided a few weeks ago to stop printing comics in the daily paper!! No more Hagar...no more Ginger Meggs...no more Snoopy, Snake et al! Damn! :)
Lee; same here. from a couple of months ago, no more comics. It was the best page in the paper in my opinion.
DeleteI see some of these warnings on Facebook with the words, "We're not going to make it, are we?" written below them. One does wonder what in hell happened with a product to have forced them to print the warnings.
ReplyDeleteMs. Moon; I shudder to think about what must have happened. In some cases the warnings are printed to stop people suing the company when they use a product incorrectly.
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