Sometimes on the way to your dream,

you get lost and find a better one.

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

you'll never guess what the postman just brought me

a poo test kit!

yep.

The government approved and supplied National Bowel Cancer Screening Program Kit.

Lay the sheet of collection paper on top of the water in your toilet. 
Poo onto the collection sheet.
Try not to get water or urine on the top of the sheet as this will start to dissolve the sheet.

Hah! 
That never works. Dropping a poo onto the sheet sinks it below the water.
Unless your poo is lighter than a feather. And whose is? Anybody?

I've done this before, so I know I'll be squatting over a bucket lined with toilet paper, then the collection sheet on top of that. 

The instruction booklet has a form inside to be filled out if you wish to defer until next year, or opt out altogether. 
In spite of my recent "clean as a mountain stream" colonoscopy, I'll do the test.

18 comments:

  1. OMG,River! That is unbelievably hilarious!! Gotta hand it to the Government...no matter which country...they sure know how to waste a lot of...."waste" and money! :D

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    1. Becky; I don't think the money is wasted in this case, if they catch even just a couple of people in the first stages, or even suspicious first signs of bowel cancer, it's worth it. My own mum died from bowel cancer.

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  2. Oh, this as you may remember is a test that the reasons for are very close to my heart. My best friend since we were five passed away in March of this year from colon cancer she was only 62. IMPORTANT . HUGS B

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    1. Buttons Thoughts; close to my heart too. My mother died from colon cancer, 12 years ago now, aged 78. So I'll do the test.

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  3. It's a messy business but necessary.

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    1. jabblog; very necessary. Here in Australia, the government sends these tests out on a regular basis to everyone aged over 55.

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  4. While I recognize the importance of these tests, I always hate having to deal with them.
    Certainly not as bad as a colonoscopy though.

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    Replies
    1. A colonoscopy isn't bad; the prep is another matter!!

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    2. Cheryl; and fishducky; the colonoscopy wasn't fun, but worth doing as I learned I'm as clean as a baby in there. The prep was awful, all that vile tasting liquid, but again, not as bad as I expected.

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  5. This is a Guvermint initiative I approve of. And have done. And will do.

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    1. Elephant's Child; me too. I know a few people who just throw theirs away. "I'm not touching my poo!" Oddly enough, they are women with children, so I assume they didn't mind cleaning up their babies all those years ago. Why would this be different? Plus, you don't actually touch the poo.

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  6. I got one too but I don't know where I put it moving things around I've lost a few things.
    Merle...........

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    1. Merle; this is one thing you should never lose. Put it near your toilet when it arrives, send it back when you're done. Easy. Try and find it, the test is worth doing.

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  7. Yep! I really needed to know that!

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    Replies
    1. she says with her tongue in her cheek...

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  8. Interesting, however, not my field of expertise.

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    Replies
    1. Not mine either, but I generally do what I'm told.

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  9. It seems your government is WAY more intrusive into people's private lives than ours is. Wow!!!

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